FUNERAL QUOTES II

quotations about funerals

After Auschwitz, I no longer cry at funerals.

CHARLOTTE DELBO

Auschwitz and After


In my recent experiences with death and funerals, I have come to appreciate the need for rituals, for the ceremony, where once I simply felt impatience, even disgust, at the whole procedure. It is hard, though, hard to make a meaningful ceremony out of death in America in our time. Certainly the funeral industry isn't interested in authenticity, it's interested in efficiency, profit, and assembly-line repetition.

ADOLF HESCHL

Das Intelligente Genom


People feel guilty enough at funerals without having more guilt heaped on. I would prefer a bighearted preacher giving my eulogy, someone inclined to widen heaven's doors. I don't want to leave folks wondering whether I made it.

PHILIP GULLEY

For Everything a Season


It is extremely hard to have a funeral when you don't have anything to bury.

ELLEN GILCHRIST

A Dangerous Age


Funerals all over the world everywhere every minute. Shovelling them under by the cartload doublequick. Thousands every hour. Too many in the world.

JAMES JOYCE

Ulysses


There was that feeling one gets in a ride to a cemetery trailing a body in a coffin -- an impatience with the dead, a longing to be back home where one could get on with the illusion that not death but daily life is the permanent condition.

E. L. DOCTOROW

Homer & Langley


Goin' to the funeral home
Got me a coffin
Shiny and black
I'm goin' to the funeral
And I'm never comin' back

DANIEL JOHNSTON

"Funeral Home", Continued Story


In the city a funeral is just an interruption of traffic; in the country it is a form of entertainment.

GEORGE ADE

Cosmopolitan Magazine, Feb. 1928


Never joke at funerals, or during business transactions.

HERMAN MELVILLE

Israel Potter


You always wonder about your funeral. How big? Who'll show up? In the end it's meaningless. You realize, once you die, that a funeral as for everyone else, not you.

MITCH ALBOM

The Next Person You Meet in Heaven


I don't like funerals and don't want one after I die. Of course I won't have anything to say about it.

GENE AMOLE

The Last Chapter


If the cost of funerals continues to go up, some people will be better off alive.

EVAN ESAR

20,000 Quips & Quotes


They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

GARRISON KEILLOR

"Lecture in San Francisco,", Lake Wobegon Days


Enemies always attend each other's funerals. I guess it is a way of knowing they won.

M.C.V. EGAN

Defined by Others


Most souls attend their funerals and have some feelings about them, but it's such an individual event. Some souls don't care what happens to their physical bodies. They see the funeral as a ritual for the living so they don't always attend.

ECHO L. BODINE

Echoes of the Soul


A funeral is not death, any more than baptism is birth or marriage union. All three are the clumsy devices, coming now too late, now too early, by which Society would register the quick motions of man.

E.M. FORSTER

Howard's End


So when the friends we love the best lie in their churchyard bed, we must not cry too bitterly over the happy dead; because, for our dear Saviour's sake, our sins are all forgiven; and Christians only fall asleep to wake again in Heaven.

CECIL FRANCES ALEXANDER

"Child's Funeral"


The dead do not know the value of white sheets.

HAITIAN PROVERB


FUNERAL, n. A pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker, and strengthen our grief by an expenditure that deepens our groans and doubles our tears.

AMBROSE BIERCE

The Devil's Dictionary


It's not what I'd want for at my funeral. When I die, I just want them to plant me somewhere warm. And then when the pretty women walk over my grave I would grab their ankles.

NEIL GAIMAN

American Gods