You can never lose a homing pigeon -- if your homing pigeon doesn't come back, what you've lost is a pigeon.
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Growing older is mandatory; growing up is optional.
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Crawling is acceptable. Falling is acceptable. Puking is acceptable. Tears are acceptable. Pain is acceptable. Injury is acceptable. Quitting is unacceptable.
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A great debt is a great evil and a great national debt is a great national evil.
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New Monthly Magazine, 1820
I'm not sarcastic. I'm just intelligent beyond your understanding.
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The bitterness of poor quality remains long after low pricing is forgotten.
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Apathy is the glove in which evil slips its hand.
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The first sign of senility is loss of memory. I forget the other two.
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If we're not supposed to eat animals ... how come they're made out of meat?
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Only in spontaneity can we be who we truly are.
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I love the smell of fresh ambition in the morning.
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It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.
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Dogs have Masters. Cats have staff.
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Grandmas are moms with lots of frosting.
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I hate Russian dolls, they're so full of themselves.
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The alternative to a vacation is to stay home and tip every third person you see.
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Women: We are busy wearing so many hats in life we deserve to have all the shoes we want.
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By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.
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Actions speak louder than words.
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The Melancholy State of this Province Considered, in a Letter, from a Gentleman in Boston to His Friend in the Country
You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving.
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